At this time in life, there are chapters and versions of my story that require saying goodbye while others are merely transition points and even more are new beginnings. Which ones are which? This may or may not be the time and place to unpack it all, but I will say that I’m probably at the most peace than I have ever been in my life. This feels like a beginning. It’s certainly a departure or good-bye of what has come before.
You may be reading this and thinking, “Vague much?” <- You wouldn’t be wrong in thinking this at all.
I saw a post titled, “This Autumn Let Something Die” by Willow on Tumblr and it made me pause. The title alone demanded I take the time to read it. So I did. It goes like this:
A worry, a relationship, a project that has run its course. Let go of anxiety over the future. Let go of guilt.
Let go of other people’s dreams for you. Let go of the fear that happiness or success or love or joyousness somehow isn’t for you.
Let go of feeling unwanted. Go outside, can you feel how deeply your presence is craved here?
Let go of the small and burdensome things. Gifts never opened. Keys without a lock. Broken earrings, old love letters, the ephemera on your fridge.
As David Whyte writes, “Anything or anyone that does not bring you alive is too small for you.” This Autumn, let go of all the clothes you have outgrown.
Let go of comparison.
Let go of doubt.
Let go of the feeling that you are somehow not good enough.
Because every imperfect apple that lays soft in your hands, and every ray of low Autumn sunlight that warms you through woolens will tell you a different story, a much truer story. The story that you are more, much more, than enough. That you bless this world simply by being alive.
These words written by a 22-year-old young lady out of North Carolina had the kind of wisdom we can only hope to acquire through experience and age. It would seem that wisdom knows no age. A special thanks to the rabbit hole I wondered down during a random perusing of the interwebs for it led me to this insightful post.
But I digress. As I near half a century of spinning around the sun, I am more myself and the person God meant for me to be. I’m not sure why it took me so long to get here, but damn am I grateful to have finally arrived. I have such a sense of wonder about this next part of my life.
As a woman, it seems like we are constantly living for others and now I am ready to live for myself. It’s a fine place to be in life. The adventure is truly just beginning and I can’t wait for all the future adventures which will shape me to be even more me.